Cinnamon El Ciclo - D.C. Comics

"Reach for the sky, Sistah!"

For every lesbian teenager that ever wanted to be a cowgirl when when she grew up.

That's right, six gun toting lesbian cowgirls at high noon. "You killed my daddy, now I'm gonna kill you."

Yeah, another one of those bargain bin goodies that will warm your heart and fill a previously unrecognized niche in any good comic book collection. Seriously, even though there isn't one single overt lesbian moment in the entire story the sexual tension is undeniable.

Okay, don't believe me; find this five book series and read it for yourself.

In fact, I may just read it myself before I go to bed tonight...

Lobo Paramilitary Christmas Special - D.C. Comics

Ya bastiches!

Who cares whether you like it or not?

I still read it to my family every Christmas and I love the tears it brings to the children's eyes.

Man, do I miss Lobo...

Caper - D.C. Comics

Good clean fun!

One of the best short run books Ive ever read, period. There are three vignettes spread over twelve issues each of which is better than the one preceding it. My personal favorite is arc three which had me laughing from the very moment it started to the moment it ended. This series is representative of why I started reading comic books and as good an answer to those who ask why I'm still reading them today. Good stories are good stories, no matter what genre you find them in.

This is one of those bargain bin gems you'll be more than satisfied to find at a convention or your local comic book store. I don't care if it ever increases in value, its a book I'll always be glad to have as a part of my humble collection. Seriously, if you find this series intact, pick it up. You won't regret it.

Most of my current collection is short run books. They get up and running quickly and I like how fast paced the shorter books are. At the current price for comic books, anywhere from three to four dollars (and sometimes even more per issue) I don't like books that take three and four issues to get into a storyline. Don't make me spend twenty bucks for little more than character introductions.

N.C.A.A. basketball is on so I'm out of here.

The Dead, Kingdom of Flies - Berserker Comics

Zombie-z-z-z-z-z-z...

I really wanted to like this book. I really did. Alan Grant and Simon Bisley working together again, how could this title go wrong? Three issues later, I'm just stunned how dreadful this comic book is turning out to be. First off, I've always enjoyed Alan's ability to take a tired old storyline and breathe new life into it. (Alan is usually so good with the twist.) I've always enjoyed his ability to take the tried and true and turn it into something twisted and new.

Sadly, this book is offering nothing new or twisted at all. The storyline is as generic as any zombie tale is capable of being and Alan's storyline offers nothing new to the genre whatsoever. I mean its got zombies-but I've been there and done that-its got a group of people isolated in a building who seem far more interested in fighting each other than they are in battling the plague around them, but again, I've been there and done that. You shoot the zombies in the head to stop them. Scratches and bites infect healthy flesh and create new zombies. Okay, I've seen this tale a gazillion times of late and this book is just a rerun of a worn out theme at four dollars per issue. I can take the same four dollars and buy another zombie movie at, Blockbuster-and the pace of the action will be much faster and scarier.

Bisley's artwork is disjointed and uninspired at best. You can just sense how uncommitted he is to the project and it feels as if he's doing the book for no other purpose than busy work. I'm used to finding a visual commentary in Bisley's illustrations and so far he just hasn't seemed to find the visual hook yet that makes the work enjoyable for him. Aside from a penis drawn provocatively close to Jesus and a naked shower scene there just isn't the running gag running through the book that marks it as a Bisley work. (To me Simon has always been a social commentary artist. His artwork usually says more in background illustrations than most writers get out of their primary story words.) The potential is there, but so far the spark hasn't caught and this book is more smoke than fire and it bothers the eyes instead of lighting them up.

I still want to like this book. Its Alan Grant and Simon Bisley for God's sake! One more issue... I'll give this book one more issue and something really cool better happen or its going into the dead pile. And trust me, once a book goes into my dead pile it doesn't get up and walk again.

Sorry, but right now I'm bored of the flies.

The Watchmen

Why this movie crashed and burned...

Okay, I'm on vacation with my wife and son in Gatlinburg, Tennessee celebrating five wonderful years of marriage so this will be quick. (A wife and a child, kinda voids my geek membership card doesn't it.)

First off, at a time where people are looking to the movies to provide a temporary respite from the problems of the day, a story stripping away the glitter of our super heroes and leaving us even one less thing to believe in was sure to be a hit. ("Hey honey, we need a break from all this bad news about the economy, let's go watch a movie about the Alamo!") See what I mean?

Second and I think most important; What guy wants to take his girl to a movie where she gets to look at a bigger-than-life-swinging-blue-schlong for nearly three hours that he knows the one he hopes to bang her with later will never compare to? ( "Oh, Charles, I guess we'll never have to worry about you becoming a super-villain now will we?") Like us geeks don't have enough problems with girls as it is. Duh...

Last but not least, I've seen better actors in porn flicks and they didn't have the benefit of costumes to hide behind.

This film was doomed from the very beginning.

Now if you'll excuse me I've got a family vacation to enjoy.

Fathom-Aspen Comics

Nice eye candy, but not much else...

Aspen Comics produces some of the most beautifully illustrated, God awful comic book titles I've ever seen. Even the non-stop gnashing of teeth and lamentation over the death of Michael Turner fails to elicit in me the faintest of reason to continue buying their product. Slow, tortuous and lacking in plot to the brink of mind numbing boredom as any ongoing title I've ever 'read'. And the entire line is like that! The Aspen motto must be, "Writers? We don't need no stinking writers!' because they don't mince words when it comes to storytelling. Hell, they hardly even use them.

One of my pet peeves with a comic book is using the artwork to tell the entire story. When I'm ten or twelve pages into a book and the only thing I've read is, "Look out!", "Jump!", Over here!", "Careful!" "sh-h-h... they'll hear you." I'm not a very satisfied reader. I always feel like I've regressed back to a time in childhood where the books I read contained sentences like, "See, Fathom. Swim, Fathom swim." Duh...

Every book I've looked at in their line is the same. By the time I've invested three dollars per issue for five or six books in a row where nothing happens and I'm no further into the development of a plot line than, "See, Soulfire. Run, Soulfire run." I'm outta there! Seriously, if you're not going to use words in telling a story, stop using them all together. I'm tired of having to purchase five or six issues of an Aspen book in order to get one full sentence of storytelling.

Comic books are a unique literary form where a balance of illustration and dialog come together to present a cohesive drama. Fathom is not a comic book by this definition, it is a picture book and quite frankly I outgrew those a very long time ago.

Using nautical terms to create a rating scale for this title I'd find myself speaking pirate as in, "Thar she blows!" and trust me, this book really does.

Warrior Nun Areala, Ben Dunn

Warrior nuns, Nazi evil and the occult!

As much as I've always enjoyed the books produced by Antarctic Press, and yes they are still putting out quality titles, I've always enjoyed reading the editorials nestled between the covers of their magazines. When I look back at their thoughts, reflections and opinions on the state of the comic book industry during the early and mid-nineties I'm struck how much more relevant their comments are today than they were then.

The relationship between those who produce comic books these days and those who read them is as dysfunctional and abusive as that between Cris Brown and Rihanna. Somehow the dynamic between creator and reader has devolved into a love hate relationship where all the comic book companies, irregardless of size, seem to love is our (the readers) money and they hate everything else about us. What the heck happened? When did we become nothing more than bitches to be pimp-slapped and abused? When did purchasing your products become a reason to ridicule and a license to treat us as the lowest possible forms of life on the planet?

With that in mind I reprint the following editorial by Ben Dunn originally published in, Warrior Nun Areala: Portraits, March 1996.

The Politics of Fanboy

Fanboy!
Doesn't sound very nice, does it?
Why is it that in this industry we are in the mood to quickly label those that have a genuine passion for the hobby? Do we feel the need to exercise our own superiority or is it a way to cover our own inner passion? Why is it so many professionals in the comic industry need to label comic readers as 'fanboy'? You'll notice there is little regard to call someone a 'fangirl'. Probably because there are so few of them we are afraid to chase off females who actually enter the hobby of comic collecting.

I remember a time it was a badge of honor to be called a 'fan'. I was passionate about comics because I loved the medium. I loved anime, manga, and science-fiction. I loved it so much I created a company. As time went on and I came to know more and more people in the industry , I began to encounter prejudices: the accepted practice of calling comic readers 'fanboys'. Why is that? You wouldn't call a Jew a 'kike', you wouldn't call an Asian a 'chink', you wouldn't call an African American a 'nigger'-unless you were a racist. So why is it okay to call a comic reader a 'fanboy'? Isn't that labeling someone because of what they are? Let's face it, nobody would want to admit in public that he or she is a fanboy, but isn't that what all of us are? Isn't the appreciation of comics the reason we are in this industry to begin with? I have not seen any other industry that treats its own customers with with such utter contempt. Through its own actions and its own words it continues to play these readers, thinking they are fools-i.e., 'fanboys' "Lets go exclusive!" was the rallying cry , and to hell with the readers, "Who cares about them? They will follow us because they are 'fanboys'" was the mantra in the industry. "Let's flood the market with as much similar product as possible because they are fanboys and will buy what we feed them," continued the industry. Just how long did they think the readers were going to fall for it? Now the industry is in the midst of almost collapsing and they have no one to blame but themselves...or do they? Perhaps, in some nameless comic company boardroom, an executive is blaming the fall on those stupid 'fanboys'. They did not realize it was these 'fanboys' that were supporting them for years, and now the truth comes out that they never cared for them to begin with.

I am a comic reader. I like reading comics and I like talking about them. I am not afraid to admit that. I think the industry needs to take a hard look at itself and its readers and try to understand that the passion of collecting and reading comics comes from within. Sure, there are those who try to manipulate it, twist it and take advantage of others to enrich themselves in this industry. It is those I consider the real threat.

Ben Dunn, 03/96



Like any bad relationship the abused victim will stick around for awhile because of the feelings of love they have have for the abuser. Eventually however the bruises become too much to bear and the return on investment diminishes beyond the ability to endure. Even the name calling becomes too much...

To paraphrase an old saying, "If you torture us, we will leave."

This post is dedicated to, Marc Hansen, who needs to read his blog, then ask himself if he were a prospective customer would he purchase his own product, given what he thinks of comic book reader/collectors regardless of whatever format he offers it?

C'mon, Dude, even Cris Brown treats his bitches better...